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Laurie L Colson

Covid 19 Thoughts

Blog September 19, 2020

Random thoughts during the Covid 19 Pandemic

Are you feeling unsteady? Are you feeling overwhelmed? Are you wondering if this will ever end? Are you wondering if you will make it? Will your kids make it? What is going to happen?

Yeah, we are in THAT time of our lives, where everything feels uncertain, unsteady, unpredictable. For those of you who study trauma, you can feel the whole country is in hypervigilance, or, what I call “the clench.” We aren’t breathing the same, we can’t relax, we are in survival mode, wondering how we can make it through and what comes next. That makes life feel like it is too much.

If that is you, you are NORMAL. I am not a fan of that word, but we are in a time and space in our lives that we haven’t experienced in a long time, and it really is NORMAL to feel scared, confused, angry, tired, overwhelmed, hopeless. Maybe after 9/11, there were some aspects of uncertainty. But now, it feels like every angle-physical, emotional, mental, psychological, spiritual (is there more?) is being questioned/attacked, and it feels like there isn’t a way out.

I know it is hard. It is SUPER hard. Please give yourself, and everyone you know some extra grace and kindness. Because this is sooooo messy. We are in the midst of experiencing a trauma response in our country, or our whole world, really. If we make it smaller to understand what is happening to our system, you could imagine that we ALL are having a bear in our living room. What does that feel like? What do we do? What does our body do? Our minds? Our hearts? Some of us need to hide to get away from the bear. Some of us fight. Some of us run away. None of those responses is ‘wrong,’ every one of them is a way that we survive. No shame, no blame, just survival.

If you can, just take a breath or two. Take a moment to listen to a song that represents where you are right now. Write or draw what it is like to be you right now. No judgement. Just a way to put it ‘out there’ instead of just swirling inside of your head and heart. We are all going through this in a way that our bodies need us to, to survive. If you are near someone, give them a hug. If you can’t hold a person, hold your dog or cat. If you can’t do that, bring up memories of love and connection. Make the call, write the letter, send the email or facebook message. We are all just trying to get through this bear in our living room. It is a pretty determined bear.

But so are we. We are tougher than we believe we are. Deep down, there is still love in that heart of yours-take the time to find it and share it. We are all fighting a bear. We can all use a little extra support. If you don’t have any, ask for some. If you have a little extra, please share it. Don’t do this alone. Don’t fight this bear alone. Cause he is mighty and fierce, but together, if we try, we can take the next step forward, and win this fight.

Don’t give up!!! Take a rest, take a breath, and then take the next step. You are stronger than you think.

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